Something wrong

Since Masters course,
my body has changed dramatically.
Heahache,
bodyache,
palpitation,
insomnia,
manic,
depressed......
May everything OK after the course.
Need to do another check up after this.
Headaching......

RM50

Today I went to Carrefour to buy something. Total bill RM60. I paid exact amount and put all my stuffs in the bag that I brought along. Suddenly the cashier told me that I only paid RM10. I was speechless. I don't want to argue with her and told her I want to see CCTV. The cashier said she will count the amount of money of the counter and let me know whether is there any extra. However, after she sent to office to calculate to amount of money and told me the account was tallied. I told the head that i would like to see CCTV. Then she told me that it will take 2 hours to process. I decided to pay RM50 and give them my hp number. Actually I was confused whether did I pay or not. I was mentally and physically tired due to lack of sleep for many days. So to prove that actually I had paid the money, the only way is by looking at the CCTV. After 2.5hours, finally she called me that they found my money. I went to get back my money. She told me next time please look at the cashier whenever doing payment. I was speechless again. Why they blamed me for not being alert during payment? Anyway, I m happy. but not because I got back the money but because I had done something right.

<..>

When Selina said she wish not to be a brave girl for a day. I say I wish not to be a strong girl for a day. Can I rest my mind and stop doing my reports? Can I cry it out? But people say i m a strong girl.

31.12.10

2010, end so fast.
many things happened in 2010.
Jan: Got transfer back to hospital, finally...
Feb: basic training made me aware of what I want.
March: advanced course made me breakthrough in my life.
March-June: LP journey-90 days of experience.
June: Mayday concert-JUMP & ROCK.
July: start master course at UKM.
Master course makes my life so busy with assignments, repotrs, presentations, classes...
today, look back 2010, it's an amazing year.
living like there is no tomorrow.
no regrets and just do it.

32 hours later, I'm going to turn 30.
I believe, it's going to be wonderful.

有惊无险的一夜

已经有两年多没有做oncall，
昨天是我的第一次oncall，从5PM-8AM，
却发生令人心惊胆跳的事件。
大约晚上11点，来了一位印裔精神病人。
他拿出police report及prescription，告诉我他被几个流氓打，还把他的药给丢了。
他希望我可以给他药。
我同意给他药，但必须依照号码。
他开始发难，一直骂我及恐吓我。
当时我独自在柜台，忙得应接不暇，
只希望他可以合作，乖乖的等号码。
我马上把门锁起来，继续给药给其他病人。
他一直打扰我的工作，还把大垃圾桶举起，意图打破柜台的玻璃。
幸好有保安人员遏制他的行为。
我被吓到手一直在发抖，只希望我的同事可以赶快回来
最后医生要我给他药，打发他走。
由于担心他会回来报复，我水也不敢喝太多，因为不敢上厕所。
后来我还是平安的度过我的oncall。

I'm Alive

今天是BASIC TRAINING的毕业礼。
5天的课程转眼就过去了。
一开始是抗拒，到最后是接受。
每次都会有当头喝棒的感觉。
原来我们一直逃避的问题都不是问题。
这5天我是完全的释放我自己，
诚实的面对自己的问题。

非常谢谢朋友介绍我这个课程，
这是我一生中最好的礼物。
还有非常感激TRAINER, VOLUNTEERS,
SMALL GROUP LEADER, GROUP MEMBERS,
ACTIVITY PARTNERS.

这个课程带给我很多的第一次。
第一次在陌生人面前说出我的问题。
第一次抱我爸爸妈妈，
第一次同一时间抱50多个人，

RM1850
可以换我要的人生，
我觉得是超值得的。

I’m ALIVE

22.02.2010

今天到布城面试MASTER奖学金的申请。
忐忑不安了4个小时，终于轮到我了。
幸好面试一切顺利。
然必须等到5月才可知道是否成功得到奖学金。
但很多时候都是前辈得到奖学金，
我们这些后辈都是陪跑罢了。

面试后就到处走走及拍照，
发现原来布城的建筑物都设计得蛮特别。
下次再找机会好好的拍下布城美丽的一面。





每年都会到佛光山参观，
因为很喜欢到那里感染浓厚的新年气氛。